I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
what day is it and did you see me today?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
