my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
