You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
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