i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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