Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
