He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
