haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize