Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
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