I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Michael Bay diarrhea
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
