Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize