i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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