I bet he comes in French.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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