I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
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