what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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