What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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