Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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