i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Randomize
