Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
"it" just moved
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
