I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
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I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
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I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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