my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize