who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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