fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
