I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
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