Texts From Last Night

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  (613): View more from Ontario

  I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.

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  (613): I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy. http://tfl.nu/5u2t
  Replies (79) Good night (9717) Bad night (1601)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind

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  (803): I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind http://tfl.nu/dnl0
  Replies (11) Good night (3827) Bad night (899)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.

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  (803): Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear. http://tfl.nu/2r4l
  Replies (18) Good night (7924) Bad night (1344)
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  (716): View more from New York

  just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.

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  (716): just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that. http://tfl.nu/r8dq
  Replies (22) Good night (1913) Bad night (5972)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart

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  (502): We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart http://tfl.nu/qvlm
  Replies (6) Good night (2094) Bad night (863)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.

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  (586): I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me. http://tfl.nu/23ps
  Replies (8) Good night (4168) Bad night (890)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.

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  (201): I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world. (540): I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him. http://tfl.nu/0ulc
  Replies (6) Good night (801) Bad night (1757)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him

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  (757): Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him http://tfl.nu/gn0k
  Replies (13) Good night (1241) Bad night (2450)
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  (760): View more from California

  Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that

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  (760): Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that http://tfl.nu/isr6
  Replies (13) Good night (758) Bad night (1642)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?

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  (404): When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012? http://tfl.nu/cat9
  Replies (12) Good night (1817) Bad night (760)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are

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  (775): Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are http://tfl.nu/iecj
  Replies (11) Good night (517) Bad night (1313)
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  (315): View more from New York

  sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off

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  (315): sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off http://tfl.nu/l1w9
  Replies (0) Good night (803) Bad night (357)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.

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  (563): Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass. http://tfl.nu/dcdi
  Replies (1) Good night (844) Bad night (291)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.

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  (713): Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better. http://tfl.nu/rcka
  Replies (4) Good night (379) Bad night (332)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext

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  (479): he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext http://tfl.nu/qad0
  Replies (4) Good night (310) Bad night (61)

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