Texts From Last Night

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  (386): View more from Florida

  tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN

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  (386): tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN http://tfl.nu/xbeq
  Replies (26) Good night (590) Bad night (3052)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet

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  (571): I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet http://tfl.nu/qd88
  Replies (25) Good night (4055) Bad night (634)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.

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  (802): I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck. http://tfl.nu/89bk
  Replies (154) Good night (1635) Bad night (40751)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.

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  (216): fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again. http://tfl.nu/nv5y
  Replies (28) Good night (13363) Bad night (2053)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before

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  (404): I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before http://tfl.nu/47j4
  Replies (16) Good night (3758) Bad night (1312)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"

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  (262): She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us" http://tfl.nu/wksb
  Replies (13) Good night (1094) Bad night (4026)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.

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  (937): Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed. http://tfl.nu/c6ek
  Replies (8) Good night (2820) Bad night (896)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix

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  (703): Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix http://tfl.nu/hs2f
  Replies (5) Good night (1695) Bad night (861)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.

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  (862): Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her. http://tfl.nu/mnen
  Replies (9) Good night (2733) Bad night (1421)
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  (916): View more from California

  I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.

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  (916): I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745. http://tfl.nu/vvre
  Replies (4) Good night (1309) Bad night (842)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  the evidence from last night is not good...

  (904): View more from Florida

  what evidence?

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...

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  (843): the evidence from last night is not good... (904): what evidence? (843): my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair... http://tfl.nu/ykqm
  Replies (3) Good night (1115) Bad night (519)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am

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  (832): My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am http://tfl.nu/1emj
  Replies (7) Good night (784) Bad night (1498)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.

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  (208): Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen. http://tfl.nu/0ir7
  Replies (3) Good night (623) Bad night (796)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Jesus Christ you're perfect.

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  (307): Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday. (303): Jesus Christ you're perfect. http://tfl.nu/7qs9
  Replies (4) Good night (966) Bad night (404)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.

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  (313): From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours. http://tfl.nu/36vr
  Replies (4) Good night (885) Bad night (524)

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