The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
