I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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