PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
