we have pet lesbian snakes
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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