i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
My penis needs a shock collar
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
