My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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