I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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