They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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