i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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