do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize