Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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