Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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