I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
