physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men