Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
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no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
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Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.