Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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