If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize