What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
