can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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