Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
