david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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