Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
it glows. i had to have it.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
