Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Randomize
