Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
