just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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