garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
He has the fingertips of a God
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
