you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
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He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
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But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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