I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
