we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Drunk is a universal language darling
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
